Growing up in the forties, fifties, and sixties, I mostly learned about service through osmosis by watching my parents, the people in my neighborhood and at church, and watching Victory at Sea on television. I had Lutheran, community, and military ideas about what it was. The way I interpreted these messages was that it was very important to relieve the suffering of others and it could come at a big price—your life.

My biggest heroes at the time, Jesus, Gandhi, Martin Luther King Jr., and JFK, were visionaries wanting to create a better world, and they were all assassinated. Would that happen to me too if I had a dream and helped make the world a better place? You may think this silly, even ridiculous, and yet it made perfect sense to me.

I also saw another aspect of service that was upsetting to me. I would overhear the ladies at church, my Grandma Inga, the elders of my church, and my teachers at school expressing resentment, frustration, and even anger if they were not appreciated the way they thought they should be. Adding these two things together, I became suspicious of people’s motivations and the value of being in service.

All of this changed when I started participating in this work and then choosing it as my life’s work. I began to see and experience the beauty and generosity of choosing service and what the words “unconditional giving” mean.

As I talk with you about service now, it is very important to understand a distinction I draw. The historical definition of service is focused outward and has to do with being helpful, dutiful, and tirelessly providing for others, even to the extent of personal loss or suffering. Now, that sounds extreme, and yet to some people that is what service is about: sacrifice. When we talk about service at Wings, it is a balance of in focus and out focus. Sharing yourself unconditionally with others, your talents, capabilities, and heart, being an instrument of kindness and caring, all the while taking care of yourself.

Wings’ mission is to inspire and support positive change, creating an abundant, loving, and respectful world community. And one of the main ways we do that is by being dedicated to service. Every day at Wings, we create an environment that is rich in respect, compassion, creativity, honesty, playfulness, acceptance, risk-taking, and community. In many ways, we have created family in the healthiest form. This does not just happen! It is not an accident. My staff and I hold our day-to-day working and living environment as crucial to the integrity of our vision for Wings.

Service is an invitation to celebrate what you have to contribute and who you are! Giving to others is a way that touches the world gently with love and respect.

Choosing service is an acknowledgement that we have something of value to share—our energy, love, expertise, time, and sometimes simply our calm presence—listening to and holding the person we are with as valuable and important.

Service is choosing to be fully present in each moment using what we have been given for the highest good for ourselves and others.

Do you want to share your love, capabilities, and enthusiasm? How would you, your family, your workplace, your community, your place of worship, the children of the world benefit by you stepping into an even higher level of being in service in your life? The world community is thirsty for the calm presence of service, for the very gifts and talents you have to share in abundance.

There is a very dedicated and tireless group of individuals that I watch transform their lives through service over a period of a year: the Wings Leadership interns. They give of themselves joyfully and patiently, with tremendous enthusiasm and playfulness. As I work with them as a group and as individuals, I am awed by their incredible commitment to living life as whole, happy, contributing people while helping others. Believe it or not, since I started in the first intern group in 1983, there have been hundreds of interns!

Each day I feel deeply honored and thankful that I “get to be” involved with so many people who support Wings’ vision, doing simple things with great love, presence, and service. Thinking about creating a better world is one thing; taking action to create it is another, because action takes commitment and courage.

I am thankful for every person on this earth who chooses service now.

Reflections:

1. How did you learn about being in service?

2. What were the strong, healthy aspects of service and what were the negative ones?

3. What is your definition of service now?

4. Who is someone who models your definition? How do you feel when you are with them?

5. If you could do one thing for the world, what would it be?

With love and gratitude,
Kris King

It’s that time of year when we start thinking of gift giving to those closest and dearest to us, of feasts and celebrations, Hanukkah, Christmas, and the celebration of winter solstice. It’s a time of gathering those we love the most, of laughing with them, of noticing the very best in them (sometimes difficult to do at a family gathering!), and of celebrating ancient spiritual and religious traditions and the great abundance we all share by exchanging gifts and preparing sumptuous meals. Sounds great, and yet… Is there something missing? During this season of celebration, do you feel filled up or perhaps empty? There sure is a lot of emphasis on the spirit of the season. Where does the spirit come from, and when does it arrive?

In case you are in doubt, I love the trappings and history of Christmas, the traditions that have arisen since approximately 336 AD when Christmas was first celebrated. I deeply respect the Jewish celebration of the victory of the Maccabees over Antiochus IV Epiphanes in 165 BC—Hanukkah. Winter solstice is an ancient celebration of being happy and thankful to be alive as the days become longer and of sharing stored abundance. All are long-established and meaningful celebrations of spiritual freedom and hope for humanity. The spirit of these traditional holy days is laden with joy, love, pride, acceptance, shared abundance, reverence for life, and peace. How do we bring the spirit back if we do not feel it?

So often as I walk through shops and grocery stores looking at the faces of people as they prepare for the holidays, I feel sad that I see so little joy and very little of the glow that I associate with peace. As I walk, I wonder what each person’s life is like and if there is any way I can brighten their day. A smile, a nod, and I am gone. What else?

What would happen if that father of three toddlers or that teenage beauty were to go back to their car and find a letter on the windshield addressed simply “To you.” They may be impatient as they open it, maybe wondering what kind of come-on this is, and then they read the words in my handwriting.

“You are no different than any person on this earth, and you are…you are light and truth and humor and love and beauty. You are endless and timeless. I do not know you, and yet I do. I love you in this precious moment of this thing we call time. We are travelling through time together, even though you do not know me. I honor how you are caring for those you love, especially yourself. I feel your pain and separation, and I delight in your joy. My life is enriched knowing there are people like you in our world. The greatest gift you have to offer is you.

Thank you for being simply you. With love, all things are possible.”

Any number of things could happen. Hopefully, one of them being the person would know that someone cared and wished to send a message of love and acknowledgment, a love letter straight from the heart.

Imagine going into an airport, opening the phone book, choosing a name, or several names, and writing a love letter straight from the heart, mailing it, and hopping on your plane. Imagine choosing a distant family member, or even one who is close, and sharing your thoughtful words. Imagine sending your words of peace and love out into the world, your own words, words that speak to your soul. Unconditional caring and giving—isn’t that what we all want to experience? And yet so often we wait for another to initiate, to come find us. Please stop waiting and start loving.

I think I have just created a new tradition for myself that takes me back to the spirit of our ancient traditions. It brings back the feeling of holy days into my everyday life.

Will you join me, at least once? When we look for ways to love and acknowledge, that’s usually what we find. And when we share them with the world, our world is rich with meaning.

How would you feel if you received a love letter straight from the heart? Write it and give it away now.

Reflections:

1. What traditions do you practice to celebrate the abundance in your life (e.g., Christmas, Hanukkah, Solstice, other)?

2. How are the things you do fulfilling and meaningful for you? How are they stressful, perhaps draining?

3. Painting a new picture of how you want to celebrate, what will you do differently?

4. Who do you think would want to receive a love letter straight from the heart from you?

With love and gratitude,
Kris King

The Wings logo is very significant to me and our organization. It signifies leaving the confines of established limitations and exploring new territory. In other words, breaking out of the box.
On October 1, James and I signed an agreement that ends our seven-year partnership in Wings, an agreement that assists both of us to move beyond the confines of our established limits and to explore new territory. Something valued, cherished, and known is ending: our partnership. As I write, I am filled with paradoxical emotions like sadness, worry, fear, and my old friend self-doubt. On the other hand, I am feeling exhilaration, excitement, amazement at my own courage, pride, gratitude, curiosity, freedom—in other words, expansiveness!

How did all of this come about? This spring when I was travelling to Hong Kong, I had time to look at Wings from a different perspective, what we call fresh eyes. I realized that in our partnership, both James and I were holding ourselves back from our true potential. We had fallen into patterns that worked well and yet limited us both (does this sound familiar?). I decided to give this realization some time, being the cautious creature I am. I also began exploring what I really want in life, what my dreams are—in other words, my own personal vision.

In August, the pieces fell into place. I became crystal clear about what I want. It was time to talk
with James. Even though I was crystal clear, it took every ounce of courage I had to say what I knew to be true. I was afraid of all sorts of things—hurting James, being selfish, not being right, etc.—but mainly I was afraid of two things. First was breaking up the established order. And secondly, taking ownership 100 percent of what I want.

I did it anyway. As I spoke, heart pounding, perspiration gathering, throat dry, I noticed that James was not responding the way I had anticipated (upset, taken aback, hurt, angry); he was nodding his head in agreement! Amazement! All this anxiety, and he’s in agreement with me. Wow!

We had a great conversation about our dreams, what we want for Wings and for each other. We both realized it was time for positive change and exploration of new territory. As our agreement grew, we decided to create a context for the transformation we and Wings would be going through.
We agreed that practicing what we teach was essential in everything we did:

1. Win-win. Wings as a corporation, our participants, our staff, Kris, and James would all benefit by whatever we decided
2. We would be completely honest with each other
3. Our love for each other would be nourished throughout the process

Guess what? We did it!

Wings Seminars goes on, offering you and your family and friends the very best seminars in the Northwest, perhaps the entire country. I am free in Wings to implement changes that are so important to me, and James is free to explore new territory. It took some time to work it all out, and we did it!

I am so proud of James; his heart and commitment have been so apparent through this whole time (and his playfulness is back!). I am so thankful to Jesse Reeder for her selfless wisdom and assistance. I am so blessed to have a staff that holds this work and Wings in such high esteem that they consistently give their best and tell the truth.

And I am proud of me too!

What I have learned, once again, is that it may be scary to dream, to change direction, to tell the truth, to stand up for what you believe in, to end things. And it is essential if you want to find out more about who you are. Breaking out of the box right now is the most exciting thing Wings has done in quite a while!

I thank you for the support you have given Wings in the past and hope that you will allow us to provide you with the best seminars available in the future. That’s what we are here for. What box are you ready to break out of?

Reflections:

1. Before making a change in something important to you, what fears arise?

2. When you are fearful, how do you handle it? What behaviors do you do, what thoughts run through your mind?

3. Where are the places in your life that you most want to create positive change?

4. Write down specifically the outcomes you want to create and your first action steps to get you started.

I encourage you to share your responses to the reflection questions in the comments section.

With love and gratitude,
Kris King